when you masturbate twice on the same day
When you finger yourself while masturbating
when you try to suck your dick and you break your ribs
If Hugh Jackman can deadlift 405 pounds, he shouldn’t have settled merely for Marius. He could’ve picked up Enjolras as well. You know what, add Eponine. Street gamines can’t possibly weigh that much. Man let’s just add the whole of Les Amis (including Gavroche). It’s Hugh Jackman. He can take it.
So today as a prank I made a sheet music print out of Miley Cyrus’ Wrecking Ball but replaced the name with “Christmas Time Meditation” and deleted the words and I’m going to put it in the with church music and see if the pianist notices.
He noticed and I can now add “Yelled at by two priests at once” to my list of accomplishments